30 Words ~ Not your ordinary ray of sun.

Dear Canada and the US Northern Hemisphere,

Thanks for the hug. Now please take your toys and go home.

Signed,

We don't want to play with you anymore this year.

~~.

Of course it could just be me.

After all you did murder my dead plant

And my new phone

And my buttbone.

I am still no good at following rules....

~~

Keepin' It Real...interesting.

I was all barefoot in the sand last weekend

just a minute south of where I'm sitting right now.

Remember?

And today mother nature is all like 

"Oh really?  Let me see about getting you some winter, sisterfriend."

I went outside this morning with my new phone

to take some beautiful pictures of the beautiful ice

dangling from the trees and house and power lines,

but my brain forgot to tell my eyes to look down, too.

Stupid brain.

And that is why you just looked at a picture of icy concrete,

which is what that is in case you were wondering.

It is also why you are about to look at my shiny new phone

which I've had for less than 3 weeks.

I'm not going to show you a picture of my strawberry bruised behind though.

You're welcome.

~~

No coupon codes, which is good because frankly I'm out of ideas for coupon code names.

Here is a sampling of the recent fruits of my labor~

all newly listed in my shop.

I've lowered the prices on many of my most popular designs

which means you no longer have to wait for a sale.

Yay, team!

~~

Let's all try to make someone this happy today, k?

30 Words ~ On Thursdays. I just happened to see one this morning and decided to play along. I'll probably forget to play next week though.

The window seat

is mine.

And the sunbeams?

They're mine too.

You won't fit here

so go away 

and take the dog.

I said go.

Pests.

The both of you.

~~

Did I mention that Chelsea will be 17 in 6 days? It has nothing at all to do with this post, but wow. 17.

S: Get up and get your ass ready...We're goin to the beach!

Now normally I don't take kindly to people telling me what to do.  I mean it's rude.  And bossy. My most often used catch phrase is probably "don't tell me what to do."    Of course I'm kidding when I say it, especially when it comes to L suggesting that "since you're up, grab us a shot of chocolate vodka" on Friday night movie night.  Because of course I'm going to grab us a shot of chocolate vodka on Friday night movie night.  I'd even get up on purpose to grab us a shot of chocolate vodka on Friday night movie night.  Or Tuesday afternoon.  Because Chocolate Vodka, y'all.

But whenever Scott texts me the above early on a Sunday morning the only word my brain can form is Yay!  I'm all about being told what to do when it means this

Also when it involves oysters and fried shrimp and the best chicken wings you'll ever put your lips on.  I'd show you a picture of the 3 dozen oysters they laid out in front of us, but that would involve actually looking at them long enough to take a picture and I don't look at raw oysters.  Not even while I'm dashing them with hot sauce and lemon and putting them on a cracker to shove into my face.  Because oysters look disgusting and how hungry was the first person who ever cracked one open and thought "YUM!"

Still, when an oyster is delivered the right way for the first time YUM totally works.

There were lounge pants and long sleeves involved, but I'll take a cool day in the sand over a cool day anywhere else.

~~

I've discovered new joy in an old creative medium.  These are a labor of love and a constantly evolving process.  Which is what I tell myself to account for the myriad of imperfections that exist in the second one.

There is a story for each, a reason for the use of specific components. 

 I'll get around to penning it on a postcard to go with them

just as soon as the right side of my brain

allows the left out to play.

~~

It is warm enough to light the torch today, so I'll be out there paying the bills.  I was kind of bummed about having to walk away from my seed beads, but just now I remembered the new silver glass colors I splurged on in November and have yet to play with.

Come on over.  I'll make you something pretty with which to make something pretty.

ALLLL the remaining packages are going in the mail today. Except one.

Pat, I need a few more days on yours.  Because you made me start from creative scratch.  Thanks for that.  :)

Today it is cold in the studio, but I'm managing.  Tomorrow it will be cold in the studio, so I will be in front of one epic historical movie or another working on this~

It keeps morphing on me.

Which makes me happy.

~~

M:  I'm not mad that he lied.  I'm mad because now I can't believe anything he ever said.

L:  Men are so stupid.  Especially him. He could have just stopped lying at any time.

M:  He did.  He just stopped talking.

L:  HA HA HA HA HA HA

M: ....

M: .......

M:  OOOH!  HA HA HA HA HA.

(that girl is pure comical genius.  Come have a cocktail with us.  It'll change your life.)

~~

It's late. I worked 12 hours today. And I'm exhausted.

But spending time with the right people cures whatever ails you.  

I'm starting to feel like me again.

~~

I should probably focus more on sentence structure, but I'll think about that tomorrow.

We are now on the steady climb back to 70 degrees by the weekend.  Yay Shorts!

I'll be torching at some point today, so I hope to get the rest of the orders shipped tomorrow.  (EDITED:  Yeah, That didn't happen.  The temps plunged back down to the low 40s with awesome drizzly rain by early afternoon.)

First I have to go either A) find a new battery to replace the one that died in my cell phone last night or B) go find a new plan.  I'm leaning toward B because Smart Talk is half the price of my current plan and my contract ended last October and $50 a month difference is $50 a month I can throw at my Jeep because I recently realized I now only have 7 payments left on my Jeep before my Jeep will be paid off and then between the $50 a month and the $350 a month Jeep payment I will have $400 a month that nobody is holding out a hand for so basically LOTTERY WINNER!  

But first I have to drag myself to the cell phone counter and figure out which plan with which options on which phones will best meet my needs....which if I am honest with you were best met when phones hung on the wall with a long curly cord that if you were lucky stretched into your bedroom or at least to the couch and if you weren't available to answer it that meant you were off doing something fun like playing outside with your friends and yes I know I sound like my mother but I don't care because really I just want to go outside and play with my friends.

Meanwhile, I'm cut off from them and everything else.  Stupid Battery.

Just enough light for the step I'm on*.

My phone says it is 17 degrees outside.  

My body, still shivering from having taken 

Chelsea out 15 minutes ago, agrees.

It is a slow going process, this cross.  Her name is Soul Fuel ~ because that is exactly what she is.

So are they.

~~

* a book by Stormie Omartian, highly recommend.

Another good one is
God Isn't Mad At You
by Joyce Meyer.

The best one though

is the Bible.

But you knew that.

~~

Although after the 11 degrees I woke up to, this is a virtual heat wave...

It is 20 something degrees in my studio right now, which means I'm not in my studio right now.  Apparently it is going to be that way for a couple of days.  I still have a few Made To Order sets to create, and if you haven't received a shipping notification yet that means one of yours is on that list...which means please bear with me a minute while Alabama freezes over.

I'm stuck inside working on this again...and by "stuck" I mean "awesome".

~~

In other news,  I deleted Mark from my phone yesterday.

Yay, team.

~~

I did go pick her up though...

I woke up crying this morning.  When I took Chelsea outside we were greeted with icy cold wind, blowing so hard that after she ran out, quickly did her business, and decided to saunter back to me...it blew her over.  Over, as in onto her side.  She laid there for a second with her head lifted up looking around for whomever must have pushed her.  I'm not crying anymore because funny.   Bad Chelsea Mommy.

It's cold, y'all.  I know many of you are smirking in my direction while you deal with negative temps and freezer sized wind chill, but I'm southern.  Unless there is snow on the ground the temps shouldn't fall below 60.  Because no.  It is 30 degrees outside right now, which means it is about 35 degrees in my unheated Florida Room Studio, which means that unless I plan on introducing body parts directly to the flame on purpose there will be no torching going on today.

If anyone needs me, I'll be right here~

~~

The Aftermath.

As defined by Miriam Webster~

noun:  the period of time after a bad and usually destructive event.

In Julspeak?

noun:    The conversations I've had in recent days with people who know both Mark and me.  Conversations in which all of the things they wouldn't say to me before (because I wouldn't have listened) flow freely from their mouths as if an attack on his character will somehow improve this situation for me.  (It doesn't.)  I know they mean well because they are sincere and caring people and truly believe the things they are saying.  So I know in my heart there is truth to the words, albeit their truth.

I'm not blind.  Mark and I introduced our demons to each other.  I met his insecurities and fears up front and in person, just as he did mine.  Did I put the character of his heart on a pedestal?  Absolutely.  Because that's what love does.  It sees the beauty beyond the dirt on the window.  Did I make a mistake in doing so? Am I sorry for any of it?  No, because I would do it all again.

In some ways I'm weaker.  There are 542 dark blue z71s in this town, and I see every single one of them every time I leave the house.  I look away and think to myself "don't look back at it" (and I don't) while at the same time my heart flips over.  Sometimes when my text alert goes off I automatically think "yay!", but it takes only a second to realize it won't be him.  I feel ridiculous when that happens, but only time will make it stop.

Time.

In more meaningful ways I'm stronger.  Because I allowed myself to trust.  To give my all.  To be vulnerable.  To risk.  To grow.

Maybe he isn't the man I believed him to be.  But maybe he is.

I'm going to choose the latter, because of MY truth.   It took someone very special to catch my eye, someone amazing to capture my heart.

I don't regret loving him.

Maybe that's because instead of bitter, what I feel is grateful for what it was when it was what it was.  And what it was is real...no matter how brief.

~~

(I'll keep writing about it here for as long as it takes me to sort it out.  Because it helps.  The release of it helps.  Sorry 'bout that.)

~~

I noticed a local address on an invoice from Etsy not too long ago, so we got to chatting and yesterday something kind of awesome happened.  We met in person and talked beads and shows and it took everything I had not to beg her for the bracelet she was wearing. It was totally me and while she shopped and we chatted all I could think was gimmethatgimmethatIWANTTHATBRACELET.

Rosa is a tiny beauty with big skills and since I am STILL thinking about that bracelet I am going to have to see about doing a beads for bracelet trade.  Hopefully she'll agree, because while I don't want to lose a new friend...I do know where she lives and I'm not above a little B&E jail time if it means that bracelet on my wrist.

I don't think I've ever seen a part of my bead inventory laid out like this before.  I felt incredibly humbled because wow.  I did that.

The photo is out of focus.

I was a little distracted
by the sound of the voices
loudly celebrating 

that I don't have a job they hate.

~~

This stupid title is the only one I can think of.

"Trials teach us what we are; They dig up the soil and let us see what we are made of." ~ Charles Spurgeon

I've gotten some emails in the last few days from people I've never spoken with.  People who for whatever reason read this blog.  I like to think it is because I'm not flying solo in my brand of crazy, but it is probably more because crazy is fun to point and laugh at...or at the very least thought provoking enough to make the sane appreciate sanity.

The recurring theme in those notes was the kind of encouragement that speaks to the deepest parts of a person, and with each one I was reminded a little more of my special.  I say reminded of not out of arrogance, but out of acknowledgement of the flawless design that each of us is.    In spite of the fact that I've made many mistakes in my life, God didn't.   Thank y'all for taking the time to write to me, to encourage me, to remind me.  Of who I am. Of what I am. That my crazy makes you think, makes you laugh, makes a difference.

I've gotten half of the orders from this week shipped, and I will get the made to orders created and shipped on Monday.  Thank you for getting in on the sale.  I appreciate y'all more than you know.  For real.


I bought this a week before the first move, but it was never hung until after the second.  I find it comforting somehow, that the messages seem to be have been meant especially for me.

Dream Big.

Be Grateful.

Help Others.

Don't Whine.

B r e a t h e.

~~

Progress.

I realized yesterday with much astonishment that the last bead embroidery project I created was last March.  Ten months ago.  If I didn't know I was telling the truth I'd be calling myself a liar.  Because months.  Ten.

(bugles, cubes, drops, triangles, hexes)

It motivated me to spend a good many hours putting those displays 

I picked up at the warehouse sale in November to use

and getting my pretties out where I can see them.

(delicas on a rotating stand)

Last night I decided to begin this year

working on something special,

and as soon as I get caught up

on Made to Order sets...

This.

I searched in vain for more cross forms like the one

I'd used previously, but thankfully I know a local artisan cabinet builder

 who took on the job of creating them for me.

I love that the finished piece will be completely crafted

by the hands of creative hearts~

meticulously and with love.

My beading worktable this morning.

It made my soul smile.

~~

To everyone praying for me, Thank you.

I can feel it, and it is working.

This pic is for you,
because silly is not something
I've been very good at lately.
I think it might coming back around
if this photo bomb is any indication.

Plus I totally look like Golem.

Go ahead and laugh.
I did.

~~

.

One day my titles will stop being about a broken heart, but for now I haz the sad.

I bought some totinos freezer pizzas today.  They're an easy quick lunch while I'm torching~ break 'em in half while frozen and you get 2 meals on the cheap.  I picked up that little tidbit in my very early twenty stupids...for which there is something to be said even though I wouldn't go back to them for a bazilliongrillion dollars.

Then tonight I went out for a little while.  Mostly because I have friends who can be total jerks if they don't get their way.  And by jerks I mean my phone didn't stop going off from noon on.  You HAVE to come out, Juls.  It is New Year's Eve.  Come out, Juls. Answer your phone, Juls.

I'm not going to stop talking until you show up, Juls.  Where are you, Juls?  So and So asked about you.  All of our old friends are here!  That's it.  We're coming over and dragging you back here.

See?  Jerks.  Loveable awesome caring people type jerks who really don't care how swollen my eyes are or how badly I need to cover my grey or that I'm as much fun right now as a box of rocks.

This is Ericca, and Ericca could make even satan smile.  If you don't have an Ericca in your life, please come to Alabama and let me introduce you.

For a little while
I felt almost normal.
I didn't cry.

I hadn't eaten all day,

so I decided on the above mentioned pizza

and while I've been writing

this happened ~

Yeah.  

If you burn it, 

just toss it.

Trust me.

~~

2014

Wow.

Happy New Year, loves.

~~